Always Learning
Growing up, I had a lot of trouble with learning letters and numbers. My mum would get so frustrated with me for taking so long to get simple things right, while all the other kids were way ahead in their progress. I distinctly remember when I was 6 or 7 years old, my mum would ask me to identify my right & left hand and I would get it wrong time and time again. Very quickly her patience turned into frustration and then disappointment, which followed up by a smack on the hand. Only many years later when I was well into my teens, did she realise that I was dyslexic.
When the first wave of the coronavirus first struck Australia, we decided to keep Noah home from childcare. It didn’t even cross my mind for him to be actively learning while he was at home - I thought it would be just a 6 week extended play. Thankfully my wife knows better, and suggested we find some activities for him to learn while being at home. Having being schooled under the Singaporean education system, I knew the pressures & pitfalls of forced and rote learning. So we were endeavouring to make learning as fun and enjoyable as possible.
A friend recommended an online learning program called ABC Reading Eggs, which we have found has worked well for Noah. He was so excited to be “playing” the phonic games (plus it meant more screen time for him). As the lessons went on however, I could feel my frustration rise when he couldn’t get lessons right despite the repetition and simplicity of it. His initial excitement faded, and soon he started to shy away from doing the lessons - probably because he could sense my impatience. Seeing him not wanting to do the lessons made me have flashbacks to the memory of my mum smacking my hand, which made my stomach turn.
As parents, I think there are times the pressure of whether our children are developing fast enough is borne out of comparison - more often than not, subconscious, especially in the world of social media. Krystin & I have found that we need to remind ourselves that Noah is on his own journey, and we are there to help facilitate, rather than dictate.
To counter the negativity that had crept in & provide an incentive for him to do Reading Eggs, we found some Japanese milk alphabet biscuits which we use as reward when he does a lesson - plus it serves as an enjoyable way to reinforce learning the alphabets.
The most rewarding moment of his alphabet learning journey is when he started to use his magnetic alphabet writing board on his own accord. He calls it his “ipad”, which we find rather amusing - mainly because we don’t actually own an ipad. He carries it around, and randomly drawing his letters or asking for words to spell.
“How do you spell tram Mummy?”
“Q is a O with a leg right Daddy?”
He’s finally getting it, we think to ourselves. But even as that sense of relief comes over us, we are also now aware that feeling is merely for our own selves. Noah will grow and develop as his own pace, and we will help him with a renewed grace & patience, and celebrate with him every victory, no matter how small or big. I guess it’s fair to say even parenting is a learning process.
